A few good men

I had a meeting with my boss, the Acting General Counsel, today in Shenzhen. He was hired a couple of months ago as an IP counsel for the company, but because of the departure of our GC, he was then appointed Acting GC until a replacement is found.

He is a nice guy. I knew it the very first moment I met him. He's Malaysian Chinese who has spent the better part of his life in the US. He's worked in a leading US law firm and in a major US company so his experience and exposure is more than excellent.

Most of all he is a good guy. I didn't have a chance to get to know him very well back when he started his job (he is based in Shenzhen, me Hong Kong; plus I started my marriage leave shortly after he joined) But today we had a long chat, and he reaffirmed my impression of him. For a GC, one may think he is too idealistic and optimistic, but hearing him say what he said, you can't help thinking that "hmm...this is good. We need leaders like him with passion and vision". He does not give you lectures and lessons, instead he shares with you his experience, with the help of some funny real and fake stories, to get the message across to you.

I was most impressed when he told me that "family always comes first. If you do what you think is right for your family and your company doesn't appreciate that, then maybe this company is not worth your effort. You can always change your job, but you can never change your family". To take up his position in Shenzhen, he had to relocate his whole family (wife + 3 kids) from the US. He certainly has a very supportive family.

When he first joined, my ex-boss (GC who has now left) and some other senior management had doubts whether he may survive this company, since he seems to be too idealistic and westernised to be working in a political and chaotic PRC company. But there is something about him that makes me believe that not only will he make a good boss, he may actually be able to win the favour and trust of our management, and therefore make all our little lawyer lives a whole lot better.

I have friends who, for all his/her life, works for bosses from hell. I have been really fortunate in this aspect, as most of my bosses are good leaders and nice people. Let's hope that it stays that way.

Interview II

This morning I went for an interview with another company. This is a world renowned sports company whose products have won the favour of millions of people, including my newly acquired husband BB.

The interview was very brief, with me meeting only the HR manager for about 15 minutes. The HR manager asked me the standard questions, and then went on to explain their corporate culture and management style.

I was told that the company is highly performance driven, and there have been, and will be, a lot of changes in personnel and company direction. The way she said it (plus her facial expression) suggested that the company is merciless when it comes to year end evaluation - if the company thinks you are not delivering results (revenue), you can pretty much start packing.

After the two interviews I had yesterday and today, I find that it really is a big bad world out there. And what has surprised me is how honest the interviewers have become these days. I remember a few years back, whoever I interviewed with would only tell me all the glorious things about their company. You have to conduct your own due diligence through your friends, or friends of your friends, who work in that company.

Despite the many complaints I may have about my current employer (lack of leadership and vision, undesirable corporate culture, poor management skills, the rudeness of some of my PRC colleagues, etc etc), I do enjoy really flexible working hours (many times my friends call me at 6pm and I am already on my way home) and I have kind of established myself in the company. Do I want to throw all these away and
rush to the unknown, where I may have to work 15 hours a day, or help the company generate millions of profits, so as to justify my existence?

I am not too sure now.

But I am not too worried about it. I have prayed about it and have lifted it all up to God. I am never sure what will be best for me, but God is.

When is too much too much?

I went for an interview today. The company runs what most people consider a very glamours business and is one of the biggest employers in HK. During the interview, the following conversation took place:

General Counsel (my potential future boss, should they/I decide to hire me/join the company): I've got to tell you, this company has the worst politics. You must come here with no expectation because whatever expectation you have as a lawyer you will be very disappointed when you see no one appreciates you. The legal function in this company doesn't command any respect. You have to fight for everything every day. We don't even have our own standing and have to sit under the personnel division. [GC went on to tell me horrible stories about their legal team being treated like crap]

Me: [Still smiling] I see. Sounds like your company is as chaotic as mine.

GC: Yeah. Everyday is a battle. You have to deal with all sorts of people problems. It's trouble when they come to you for advice. It's even more trouble when they don't come to you until shit hits the fan.

GC then continued for another 15 minutes to talk about the pain of being a lawyer for this company, and then went on to talk about business trips:

GC: Business trips is part and parcel of this job. I don't expect you to travel a lot on a frequent basis but when you do, the business trips can be extremely demanding. I have more than once travelled long haul to a country, only to be there for a few hours and then I have to get on the earliest plane to come back to HK. And you are not allowed to have jet-lag. Oh and since your role is a world-wide role, you will have to work the Europe and US time zones as well, and when you have a global conference call, you sometimes have to get up at 5am to take those calls.

Me: [......]

GC: And senior management may wake you up in the middle of the night and ask you questions, and you have to give them answers there and then.

Me: [......]

While I truly appreciate the honesty of the GC in telling me the reality of the working environment despite the huge risk of scaring me away (he said, and I truly agree, that he'd rather tell me everything upfront for me to make an informed decision than for us to have a mismatch of expectation), I cannot help thinking how tough it will be working in such a position, having to deal with the sorts of challenges that were mentioned, and having to work 3 time zones and weekends and take late night and early morning calls. The remuneration package is not spectacular either. And did I mention that should I take the job, I will have to spend 3.5 hours each day commuting to and from work?

The upside of things is that their office complex is like a mini community, equipped with a gym, a theatre, a mini supermarket, a bank, and whatever you can think of in a local community. Oh and you get to see many many glamours people every day. That's not too bad.

無題

凡事都有定期。

萬事互相效力。

I see you, I see you not

如果眼睛是靈魂之窗，而你因爲戴了那些新科技小黑環隱形眼鏡而使瞳孔變得大了亮了，而如果有男生因爲你大了亮了的瞳孔而愛上了你，那你怎辦？難道日日夜夜也要跟這小膠片做朋友？你又有沒有欺騙觀衆之嫌？

眼睛會説話。我可以理解人們（包括我）希望用eye shadow, mascara, eye liner, 等等等等把眼睛弄得漂亮一點，但瞳孔是另一回事，它是一個人真誠的指標。如果隨隨便便的把這個指標加大改小，那和騙子又有什麽分別？ 我看見你但看不見真的你，那我還是不是看見你呢？

好書推介

《小事情》-- 陳慧

“別小看生活中這些小事情，小事情中有大道理。因爲每個人的生命，都是日日夜夜由如此這般的小事情交織而成。”

很久沒有看過一本叫我真正感動的書。如書名一樣，說的都是發生在小人物身上的小事情。陳慧一向擅長觀察和捕足生活的細節和感情描寫，這次沒有例外。

你和我都是小人物，看這書，你會驚訝有人可以這麽精准地了解你的内心世界。在地鐵裏看這書，好幾次弄得我鼻子酸酸。旁人怪怪的看着我，好不尷尬。

趕快看哪！

活着，多好

在風和日麗的下午，吃着自己摘的，紅紅的水果，看着不太嚴肅的書。









屋子被葡萄樹包圍，綠綠的，眼睛很久沒有這麽舒服過了。在草地上奔跑着，跟大黑狗玩角力，跟愛人踢足球，這種喜悅，不能言喻。









小羊Bob。看着他，想起家裏的貓。然後發現，自己惦念的人或物，只要回到家就可以看見，著實是一種福氣。









跟愛人在路上奔馳，他駕車我看地圖，聼着At 17，Madonna，Santana，Robbie Williams，又越過高山又越過谷。












在湖邊餵鴨子。牠們一看到麵包，就從老遠游到岸邊，團團的包圍着你。鴨仔歌伴着浪聲，比世上任何音樂還要好聼。









雨後的彩虹，久久不散。









看到無盡的山脈，看到蔚藍的天，看到上帝的大能。









一覺睡醒，迎接自己的，是美味的早餐。









與愛人看日落。









早上七點半，在農場的母牛，被帶進牛棚裏榨牛奶。不久，隱隱聽到牛棚外有叫聲，走出去看，發現小牛原來從老遠的農場走到棚外等媽媽，待母牛榨完牛奶之後，兩母子就一起緩緩地走回農場。每天如是。“牠們就好像人一樣啊！”農場主人說。











在一個別人要上班的下午，在餐廳隱蔽的後院裏，吃着青口喝着啤酒，感覺着皮膚被慢慢曬黑。（現在的我黑得像菲傭一樣）











你說，活着，多好。

Goodbye Kiwiland

BB and I are now at Kiwiland airport waiting to fly back home. This past two weeks has been a blast. We have done the adventurous things (riding on a 4x4 across a river!) and we have had time to just chill out and relax (and snap loads of pictures).

As much as I enjoy being pampered by good food and sunshine and blue sky every day, I am missing home now. More importatnly I can already think of 1,000 post-wedding/honeymoon chores I need to do when I am back.

So stay put. I promise I will come back with an update (and pictures) soon!

You know you are full of blessings when...

- the weather was superb on your wedding day (sunshine and blue sky!)
- your best men, bridesmaids and groomsmen, being ever so professional, help you take care of all of your worries so you can concentrate on being the bridezilla you want to be/can't help being
- your maids of honour, having known you for so many years and having seen the worst of you, are willing to subject themselves to a day of hard work and dealing with the drama queen, in the hope that they will also get to see the best of you (Amy & Susanna, I love you)
- your close friends and family are the witnesses of this important moment of your life
- you get to marry the love of you life, and spend the rest of your life with him, for better or for worse
- your marriage is blessed by God and He sure was as happy as you are on your big day

A big thank you to all of you who were there at the church wedding ceremony and/or the evening reception. Words cannot begin to express how much it means to both BB and me that you could be there to share our joy. A heartfelt thank you in particular to those who travelled all the way from all corners of the earth to attend our wedding. We love you all.

-------------------

BB and I are now in KiwiLand. The food here is superb and the scenery even better. People say sometimes a place is so beautiful you just have to point the camera and shoot, no matter where you're standing. KiwiLand is just like that. More later. Now I need to make myself a chamomile tea to help digest all the oysters and seafood I had. Don't be surprised when you see me become a balloon in two weeks.

Panic attack

I am starting to have the following nightmares about my wedding day:

(a) my make-up artist failed to turn up on the wedding morning and I had to do my own hair and make-up (disaster);

(b) I snoozed the alarm too many times so that when I woke up it was already 11.30, as opposed to 8.15 when I was supposed to get up (disaster);

(c) while I walking down the aisle, I tripped over my oh-so-pretty wedding dress and had the worst belly flop in front of all the guests and made a complete jerk of myself (major disaster).

Panic attack again. I need fresh air.

Questions (Part II)

How do you work with someone for whom you have zero respect?

How do you work with someone who asks you to replace the word "free" in the sentence "...Party A warrants that the products will be free from defect..." with something else because "people may think it means "free of charge""?

How do you work with someone who always interrupts a conversation so at any given time during a conference call you can hear at least 2 voices speaking simultaneously, and the noise is giving you a splitting headache?

How do you work with someone who is so stupid that you think it's a sin for him to exist in this world, and you actually feel embarrassed to be seen working with him?

I need a drink.

Revelations

(I)

昨天黃昏，放工途中，在地鐵裏如常地開始發白日夢，想着想着，忽然驚覺原來距離結婚日子，只有三星期不夠，心裏發毛，冷汗直標。

之前一直忙於新屋裝修的事情，籌備婚禮的工作擱在一邊，現在家也搬了，也就繼續婚禮準備。只是沒有想到，原來時光真的會飛逝，剩下的日子不多了，但好像很多事情還沒準備好。喜帖沒派完，鞋子沒造好，教堂程序表沒印好，皮膚還是很差（豆豆跟我仍是好朋友）...怎麽辦？

(II)

Last night on the way back home after our meeting with the videographers, BB said, shaking his head, "You really are a control freak". I tend to believe him, because I was getting that feeling too. From the house moving to the wedding preparations, I just have to be involved in every minute detail of things. From the colour of the paint to the way the door handles should be installed; from the style of my wedding dress to the exact timing the photographer should appear at our doorstep to the way I want my bouquet to be tied (hand-tied, not the round ones), I just need to be sure everything is under control, and that everything is to my liking.

I remember some years ago when I was lunching with my gal friends and we were talking about weddings and other gal stuff, all my gal friends agreed that I was gonna be one bridezilla. I didn't know what prompted them to say that, for I didn't think I was particularly fuzzy or demanding (on the contrary I thought I was rather easy-going). They said "yes you are easy-going, but when it comes to wedding, you will be a Bridezilla with a capital B". Damn, I hate it when they are right.

How I love my shiny kitchen

...and the bathrooms and the study and the bedroom and the guest room and the living room and the dining room, which are all new and shiny and smell of paint and new wood.

The housemoving could not have gone more smoothly, starting from Friday evening when we moved some of the smaller boxes to the new house (with the help of our friends), and ending with the big moving truck coming over and wrapping our sofa and dining table and mattress with super large cling film and transporting everything big and small to the new house on Sunday afternoon. The unpacking and tidying up took only a few hours (with the help with both my parents and BB's mom and the part time maid) and by 8pm Sunday the new house is 99% functional. We are so blessed in having such lovely parents and friends.

I am so glad this is now over. We can finally focus on the wedding preparations in the next few weeks.

--------------

P.S. I never realised I have expensive taste until Saturday afternoon, when we met with the florist / event co-ordinator to discuss our wedding decoration. When asked what kind of flowers we wanted to use for the wedding, I picked the flowers which turned out to be really expensive (e.g some rare specie of peony, amaryllis, and some exotic flowers the names of which I can't remember, etc). This wasn't intentional - I just thought they were super beautiful. Obviously, BB wasn't impressed (and kept rolling eyes at me), and at the end a compromise was reached, so that instead of using all the expensive flowers, we will also mix them with some of my less favourite, but more economical, flowers.

So don't be surprised when you will see roses at our wedding reception.

Question

If my job requires me to:

(1) travel to China (by cross-border shuttle bus) on a weekly basis; and
(2) work with people who think they are always rights just because they happen to be your boss,

and I:

(a) have a massive headache every time I commute to and from China; and
(b) do not enjoy one bit working with those smart asses, who are rude and unreasonable to say the least,

should I then seriously consider quitting? But won't that mean I admit defeat? I am better than that. If I go somewhere else, does that mean I can avoid working with Chinese at all?

My head is spinning again.

----------------------

On a different note, WE ARE MOVING HOUSE TOMORROW! Our old house is now full of boxes, and apparently Siu Bo is very confused now, seeing all the boxes stacked up in our living room but having no idea what is going on. I hope he is not thinking that we are conspiring to abandon him.

My next posting will probably be made from our new apartment!!!

我我我我我

原來我很介意別人怎樣看我。

原來我很容易哭。尤其是受委屈的時候。

原來我很需要被我重視的人了解。如果我的說話被誤解，我會不厭其煩地解釋，直到對方明白（或怕我煩所以敷衍說明白）。

如果我一直當你是朋友，但你只把我當作你講是非的一個題目，我會很傷心。但我已經學會放手，畢竟我的朋友多的是，少你一個不算少。

原來我愛我的家人，比我想象更多。但我從來沒有表現出來。

原來在工作的層面上，我從來不是一個有野心，喜歡挑戰的人。一份朝九晚五，不需用腦的工作，其實最適合我。

原來我是很膚淺的（見到靚仔會開心半天！）。

原來我的意志力很薄弱。看我減肥減了這麽多年還是老樣子便知道了。

原來我是一個記仇的人。我可以原諒一個人，但他對我的不好，我一世都會記得。

原來我很怕看那些關於落後民族的紀錄片。一看到他們的大耳窿，畫花了的臉，吃樹皮（或其他奇怪的食物），我會毛骨悚然。我承認在這事上，我是徹底的種族歧視。

原來我不喜歡我的芝士被移動。“改變”跟我，從來也不是好朋友。

原來我非常極度十分不喜歡社交。 在社交場合，我可以表現得很好，但我一點也不享受。

最好的工餘節目是回家跟貓玩。看看電視也不錯。跟愛人家人朋友在家吃飯也很好。

原來我在這裡寫的東西，真的有人看。謝謝你們給我的回應與鼓勵。我開這個blog，就是爲了跟你們分享，這目的，現在總算達到了。

It's about time

My posting has been a bit sporadic lately, and it's likely to be the case at least for the next two weeks.

The renovation of our new flat is coming to an end and we are hoping to move in the next weekend. That means in the next ten days or so, we will spend all our evenings and weekend packing and bubble wrapping things. This is a stressful exercise. Fun, but stressful.

I'd better lose 10 pounds out of this.

A visit to the ultrasound room

OR "Oh-my-God-the-baby's-heart-is-beating!" or "Oh-my-God-it-has-the-cutest-lips!"

My friend B is 25 weeks into her pregnancy and this morning she and her husband C paid a visit to the doctor for her regular pregnancy check-up. I, the nosy one who enjoy being vicariously pregnant, tagged along. After some routine blood and urine sample collection, we were shown to the ultrasound room.

B and C must be very used to this, but I was very nervous, as this is the first time I get to see a real baby through ultrasound.

The baby had its face hidden by its hands most of the time, and we couldn't see clearly its features. In fact most of the time all I could see was a big circle (the head). But at the very end, for a few seconds, the baby removed its hands from its face and we could see its features. It has very cute thin lips and a big nose (CUTE!). I also heard its heart beating. It was awesome and I was almost speechless (except the arrrhhs and ohhhhhs).

The mystery of childbirth never ceases to amaze me. This is probably God's biggest and best manifestation of his omnipower.

Centre of the Universe

Since my university years, I have never enjoyed being the centre of attention.

When I was young, I used to get a lot of attention. I went to a very decent girls' school, I was always one of the good students who got good grades and never caused troubles. I was rather popular (at least when compared to the geeky ones) in school and had quite a lot of good friends (most of whom I manage to keep in touch till now, for which I am very proud of myself). I was a member of the English debate team and once I won the best speaker prize. I took part in the drama competition and enjoyed every bit of it.

Until I got into the university. The uni experience was really an eye-opener. In law school, you see all kinds of smart people, REALLY SMART people. Your classmates are from international schools so even though they are also locally born and bred like you, they speak impeccable English. Some are from really really rich families. And did I say they are smart?

The transition from secondary school to university years is a very humbling experience. You discovered that you were nowhere near being the cream of the people. I wasn't frustrated for I am not the competitive type, but since then I had this change within me, the change that tells me I should avoid being in the lime light at all costs, because I am never good enough when compared to some other people. This is not a sense of inferiority, this is just reality.

I write about this because more and more I feel that I am starting to get the attention now. I get asked questions about the wedding preparations, whether I feel nervous, and how they all look forward to seeing "the most beautiful bride", etc. etc. While I do really appreciate the care and concerns and compliments (and yes I also want to be the most beautiful bride, but first I need the stupid zits to leave me alone), sometimes I feel quite uncomfortable addressing these questions and comments, because the conversation would be all about me me me. Most importantly, I worry that the people who ask the questions may only ask them out of courtesy, and are therefore not really interested in what I've got to say, so I tend to keep the conversation brief. As BB said, telling a person who's not getting married anytime soon everything about YOUR wedding preparations may bore the hell out of him/her.

So next time when you ask me how the wedding preparations are going and I respond with a simple "it's ok lah", it's not because it's ok (wedding preparations are never ok, you have all sorts of complications), it's only because I don't want to bore you with the minute details.

But if you really are interested in what flowers I use for the wedding, what are the colors of my evening dresses, what hairstyles I would wear, etc. etc., you can always come to this blog. After all, a bridezilla would not be able to hold her excitement. Thank God for cyberspace.

Yippee!

Two more hours before the long weekend starts! This coming weekend will be very eventful - my biannual visit to the hair salon, inspecting the new house (the flooring and tiles are done!), buying accessories for the new house, pop concert, prison ministry, yum cha with my family and welcoming BBM from London!

Next week is Golden Week in China, that means my clients are on holiday and I will have less work!

There are days when you feel like shit, but today is not one of those days :)

Grrrrrrrrrrrr

老闆下星期離職，本來說好不會給我的處理的爛攤子統統卸給我，還鑊鑊新鮮鑊鑊甘....下星期還要和麻煩董事高層開會....遲些還可能要去波蘭收拾殘局！

哎呀,想死!

It is a bit late to post this but just so you know...

The protest is over, but the killing surely will not stop overnight.

This world would be a much better place to live in if we are more animal-friendly.

Earthquake

Had lunch with B and H in Central today (yes it's a long journey for me, covering 16 MTR stations). Over seafood linguine and Tiramisu, the topic of earthquake popped up, and I felt left out when I told them I didn't feel anything when it happened last Thursday in Hong Kong.

How could I miss it? It only happens like, once in a century! And the quake measured 3.5 on the Richter scale! According to some press description, "an earthquake has rattled Hong Kong, causing skyscrapers to shake and sending people running into the streets in rural areas". Some people said it felt like a plane crashing into their building. How could I not have felt anything?

At the time when the quake happened, I was AT HOME! COOKING! Just doing what all other people were doing when they felt the shake! My friend B said it must be because I had the kitchen hood switched on - the noise of the hood plus the fact that I was engaged in a battle (i.e. cooking) had made me oblivious to the shakes and moves outside my apartment.

Whatever the reason maybe, part of me feels bad for missing out on this "collective experience" (I have never experienced any earthquakes in my life (Thank God) but it would be quite exciting to feel it once, not the major fatal ones, but minor ones like what we just had), but at the same time I couldn't help but think that maybe ignorance really is a blessing sometimes. Something bad happens but I am ignorant of it, so life goes on, every one's fine and dandy at the end and we all live happily ever after.

Life cannot get any better than this.

The One

A Saturday afternoon. We just had lunch at home. You were sitting at one corner of the livine room, I the other corner. We were both reading the newspaper. You always let me read the City section first as you know I never read the Sports news.

We were just there, occupying our own little space, reading our own inked papers. We didn't exchange a word, not even a glance. And then I had a look at you, and a sudden sense of peace overwhelmed me. I thought to myself, "This feels good. I probably can do this for the rest of my Saturday afternoons."

At that moment, I knew I had found The One.

好好戀愛

我的天父 可否讓我好好的談戀愛 不再流淚 不再傷痛 不再聚合又要分開
我的天父 我只想要安穩的找個人來愛 請讓我知道 那個人在不在

我的孩子 難道你忘記了我就是愛 學懂愛我 學懂愛你自己 你就懂好好戀愛
我的孩子 何不嘗試安靜的慢慢去等待 你就會知道 那個人在不在

你是否願意相信 每時每刻都在我手裏 沒有事情 是太早或是太遲
愛我的主 我願意相信 萬事萬物都在你手裏 請教我順服 你的旨意

------ 好好戀愛


曾經有同樣的感受，同樣的疑問；天父亦給我同樣的答案，同樣的安慰。只要你能相信，順服，最好的其實一早已經為你預備好。在神的世界裏，一切事情也是perfect timing的。

在婚宴不會說的一些話

我跟男友分手，你看見我在哭，你比我更傷心。你對我說了一些話，讓我感動至今。

有時我心情不佳，對你説話語氣不好，但你永遠不會怪責我，事後又如常的對我好，令我内疚非常。

你一有空就會駕車過來陪我吃午飯，儘管吃完之後又要馬上駕車回家跟你的老友喝下午茶。

你知道我們不常煮飯，沒有湯水，便會多煮我們的一份，然後山長水遠駕車把飯餸帶過來。有時你還會照顧我的娛樂需要，把八卦雜誌也一并帶給我。

每逢打風下雨，氣溫稍降，你總是第一個打電話給我，告訴我要多穿衣服，帶雨傘出門。

從小到大，我的一切需索，你都統統給我滿足，我從來不曾缺乏。

你給我無限的自由，讓我做我喜歡的事，跟我喜歡的人交往。要給兒女這麽大的自由，其實是挺冒險的，但你們對我信任，知道我不會亂來，也知道即使我在外頭吃了苦，受了傷，我永遠可以回到家裏這個避風港。

謝謝你讓我知道什麽是無條件的愛。

After 12 squid balls, 3 pork chop buns, 4 bird's nest egg tarts, 2 African chickens, 1 birthday cake, and lots of champagne, laughters and tears...

We have waved our goodbyes to the Asian casino land. The hen trip was full of fun and warmth, and once again I am so glad God has blessed me with so many wonderful sisters.

Squid and fish balls











Pork chop bun








Egg tart with bird's nest








African chicken








A little surprise birthday cake -- well, it was meant to be a surprise, you know the way it works: the waiter brings out the cake and people sing the birthday song, but in our case the waitress came to our table and asked very loudly IN FRONT OF THE BIRTHDAY GIRL "Do you want us to bring the birthday cake out now?". Naturally, no tips for Miss Stupid.

Strippers, booze and wild sex...

is what we are NOT having for our hen weekend (well, maybe a bit of booze, but strippers? No thank you, it is so cliche). Counting down: 20 hours.

There are two brides-to-be (me and my friend K - we decided to do a joint hen weekend as it involves similar participants) so it will be doubly fun!

I don't know what we are doing except that we are going to Macau. I do believe it will involve a lot of yummy Portuguese food (and Port!).

On the other hand, the guys are having their stag night on Saturday. As expected, the two grooms (BB and R, K's fiance) insisted that they have separate stag nights (excuse to have two crazy night outs instead of one). Boys will be boys...

Will post some photos when I am back!

不准掉頭！

昨天終於拿到遲了足足2星期才起貨的請帖了。出奇地，沒有什麽錯漏（在過去6星期裏，我每天也在擔心，如果印刷出錯的話，便來不及再印，到時便“大檸樂”了）。可能神看見我這麽擔心，生怕如果真的有什麽出錯，祂這個女兒一定會爆血管，所以便大大保佑這事 ^O^

媽咪跟弟婦也很好，昨天特地到灣仔陪我去拿總共4大袋，厚典典的大小請帖啊，信封啊，利是封啊，諸如此類。

這代表漫長的入帖/寄帖/等回復/排座位表/確認回復/修改座位表/等等等等的重要工程正式開始。當然還有美容/減肥/試身/造鞋/教堂程序表/揀歌/試菜/場地佈置/等等等等的事宜要陸續處理。

嘩好忙啊！連食薯片和雪糕都沒時間！

Salt and Light

The cleaning lady just came into my office and gave me a little individually-wrapped cake. She said today is her last day at work. She is not an employee of our company, but works for a cleaning company that we engage to clean our offices. This lady only comes into our office at the end of each day to take out our trash.

I suddenly feel a bit sad. All this time my converation exchange with this lady does not go beyond the simple "Hello", "Thank you", "You going home soon? - Yes, about to", so I should have no reason to feel saddened by her departure. After all, people come and people go.

But the cake. Why did she give me the cake? And from the way she gave it to me (in a hush hush manner even though there was nobody else in my office), I figured that she gave the cakes to selective people, and I was one of the lucky few. What have I done to deserve the cake? I don't even know her name! I haven't ever asked about her, whether she has kids, how long she has been in this job. And yet she gave me this cake, perhaps thinking that in some way there is a connection between us (which I failed to notice).

It seems that the cleaning lady and I are in reversed positions. As a Christian, I should be the one reaching out to people, regardless of whether the recipient understands or appreciates such friendliness. But here I am, sitting in my office, receiving a cake from an almost stranger, while wondering why I should be getting this gift in the first place.

This has been playing in my head for the past 72 hours

Make me a channel of your peace
Where there is hatred let me bring your love
Where there is injury, your pardon, Lord
And where there's doubt, true faith in you

Make me a channel of your peace
Where there's despair in life let me bring hope;
Where the is darkness, only light;
And where there's sadness, ever joy

Oh, Master, grant that I may never seek
So much to be consoled as to console;
To be understood as to understand
To be loved, as to love with all my soul.

Make me a channel of your peace
It is pardoning that we are pardoned
In giving to all men that we receive;
And in dying that we're born to eternal life.

--- Make me a channel

I should say this to the people in my office building

"Do you ever hold the door open for somebody and they just waltz right through there? No eye contact, no thank you, no nothing. You're just standing there "Well you're welcome Your Majesty! Sorry I didn't sprinkle rose petals for you!""

---From Ellen DeGeneres - Here and Now

This stand-up comedy is brilliant! As always, Ellen rocks!

Questionnaire

I have completed this questionnaire. If you care enough for our fluffy friends, please help.

----------

Survey on HK's Aaimal Welfare
虐待動物法例問卷調查

The government has proposed heavier penalties on animal abuse in April this year. In order to gauge public opinion on the overall animal welfare
situation in Hong Kong, Animal Earth, an animal rights organization, wishes to collect your views through an email questionnaire.
港府於今年四月建議加強虐畜罪行的罰則。為了解市民對法例罰則和香港整體動物福利的看法，動物權益團體《動物地球》現進行一項電郵問卷調查。

Please help us by finishing this simple survey. The overall results will be published afterwards while detailed information will be kept confidential.
請大家花一點時間完成簡單的問卷。我們稍後將會公佈問卷答覆的整體分析及結果，但個別資料會絕對保密，謝謝。

http://www.my3q.com/home2/115/animalearth/86527.phtml

Thank you.

Dr House

Recently I have become a fan of Hugh Laurie, or Dr Gregory House in House M.D. Until House M.D., I never knew who Hugh Laurie was, but BB told me he was already very famous in the UK before House M.D. (he is British, which was a surprise to me because he speaks impeccable Amercian English in the drama series), and was in A Bit of Fry and Laurie and Jeeves and Wooster and Blackaddar (where he plays the dimwit Prince George). I googled him (yes when I am obsessed I am unstoppable, just like I was with the pontikege, and btw I am over pontikege now, surprise surprise) and discovered that he is actually very multi-talented. He plays the piano, guitar and harmonica. He sings very well. He writes novels. He bikes. He rows. He also graduated from Eton and Cambridge.

Oh and did I mention he has the most incredible blue eyes? And I have seen him in interviews, his sense of humour amazes me, and he is nothing like the cranky Dr House character he plays.

There really is something about men named Hugh (Hugh Grant! and Hugh Jackman!).

Girl power

Last night, I went for a kickboxing trial class with a friend. I have taken kickboxing classes before, but those were the group classes held in a gym, where you jab and kick with 40 other people in a not-very-big room. The experience was not very pleasant.

Last night was a Rolls Royce experience when compared to the group classes I took before. First, it was a private lesson so it's just the coach and me and my friend. The gym itself is not big, like twice the size of a high school classroom, but it has a boxing ring (mini version I suppose - I don't know how big a proper boxing ring is), a few sandbags and enough spare room for you to run about kicking asses. Last night there were no other classes or students, so the coach, me and my friend had the whole place to ourselves. We spend the hour kicking and punching. Oh and we wore boxing gloves and kick real people (i.e. the coach)!!

Strangely, I didn't sweat a lot during the class but I could definitely feel I have had a good work out - today my arms and legs are hurting. But it feels good.

The private classes are not cheap, but being DBJ (and a closet shopaholic) I of course have signed myself up. I hope I can shape up my figure for the wedding. Better spend money on this than on a pair of Manolo right?

I will be an ass kicking queen! BB should be very worried.

辣手摧包

我最近愛上了吃麻糬（Pontikege），是瘋狂的那種愛，晚上睡覺時會掛念它，早上返工時會特地在公司三條街以外下車，只為去麵包店買它當早餐。這種小麵包由來已久，但不知道爲什麽我一直沒有看上它，直到現在。

Google了很久,也找不到關於麻糬的詳細營養資料，只知它也算健康食品，但健康食品總有脂肪，有蛋白質卦？就是找不到有關資料。

但也沒關係。觀乎我“新xx，三日香”的性格，大抵會每天吃麻糬，吃它一兩三個星期，然後熱情過了，就再也不會碰它。

The unbearable heaviness of being

In this week's Next Magazine, there is an article about a woman who suffers from delusional disorder, but the focus of the article is on the husband of the woman, who takes care of her all these years.

15 years ago, this woman killed her 13-year-old daughter with a knife and strangled the other daughter, who was 8 years old then. When the husband arrived home from work, he discovered the crime scene. The wife was later diagnosed of suffering from delusional disorder, an illness which led her to believe that the world is conspiring against her and therefore she needed to kill her daughters to protect them. She was convicted of manslaughter and was sentenced to psychiatric treatment.

The husband bears no hatred towards the wife. He quit his job to take care of her and he even blames himself for not discovering the wife's illness earlier and getting her the proper treatment.

Meanwhile, on the other side of the planet, rumour has it that Kate Hudson is splitting with her husband after six years of marriage because of Owen Wilson. Allegedly Kate and Owen hit if off while filming a movie together.

I like Kate Hudson and I am not being judgemental here. I write about her simply because I read about it on the same day I read about the husband, and it strikes me.

What is true love? I think true love is a choice. You make a conscious decision and you stand by it. It takes a lot of faith and a lot of hard work.

Wah, true love is such heavy stuff. No wonder divorce lawyers are making so much money.

廣告時間

裝修

新屋裝修，公司也在裝修。每天電鑽吵過不停，令本來已經容易頭痛的我，更加辛苦。

也好，給我一個藉口早點放工哈哈。

88... and counting

I have a countdown calendar on my personalised Google homepage so I know it's 88 days before our wedding. The preparation progress has been very promising so far:

- we have booked all the important services like church, reception venue, make-up artists, wedding dress designer, photographer, videographer, decoration, and band.
- we collected the wedding bands yesterday.
- I am meeting with the wedding dress designer this Friday for a second fitting (i.e. I have to crash diet in the next few days to rid myself of the extra pounds I gained from all the crisps and movenpick ice-creams).
- meeting with the videographer is next week.
- we will collect the invitation cards from the printer this Sunday.
- we have started to put together the wedding schedule.

There are of course a lot of other small but important tasks that we need to take care of, but one thing at a time. BB and I have agreed that every day we have to make some progress on the preparation work, big or small. Yesterday it was finalising the wedding party, today it is calling the stupid "I-am-sorry-our-lines-are-busy-no-matter-how-many-times-you-call" Marriage Registry to arrange for the application of a marriage notice.

Athough I do not mind being busy for a happy cause, what I really want now is fast forward to 3 months later, when the wedding is over, the house moving is done, and we are enjoying the lovely wines in the lovely vineyards. Oh honeymoon, honeymoon, I want you. Now.

It's not time yet

"There is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under heaven:

a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace."

---Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

A few nights ago I dreamed that my dad had cancer and was dying. The dream was so real that when I woke up, I was in cold sweat and trembling. The dream also triggered the all too familiar train of thoughts, which, as it always have, left me helpless and lost.

It was obviously only a dream, but it could have been reality, easily. Every telephone conversation you have with your parents, every time you see them, could so easily be the last time. The world is too unpredictable, life is too fragile, there are too many crazy terrorists out there who spend their entire life thinking how to blow up planes, too many reckless drivers, too many new types of illnesses.

It takes a tremendously wise and faithful person like King Solomon to be able to understand the profound truth in life. The Book of Ecclesiastes, written by Solomon, tells us that God has ordered all things according to His purposes, and that a man's role is to accept these things as God's appointments. But sometimes, with some things, it is just too hard to accept.

Cream, Sea-shell, Ivory, Magnolia, Cosmic-latte...are all fancy names for white

Today BB and I and our interior designer went to Lockhart Road to sort out the various materials for the house renovation. Thanks to the comprehensive due diligence we did the previous few weeks (including countless arguments), today is a very smooth process. Within two hours, we have decided on the bathtub, wash basins, shower system, taps, kitchen tiles, washroom tiles, and floorboards. Considering both BB and I have very strong and different preference, I am really impressed with our progress today.

Of the 5,000 things we need to do with the new house, one thing is checked! Only 4,999 to go!

Am typing away in my study now. The weather today is perfect - it's been a long while since we saw the blue sky. Hong Kong has become so polluted that clear blue sky is a luxury now.



Meanwhile Mr. Bo is happily napping:



Happy is BB also. He just bought a new game. That means in the next few days I will be an XBox widow.

New apartment

Completion of our new apartment purchase has just taken place! In case you are not familiar with Hong Kong property law, this is how the sale of a second-hand apartment usually goes: once you and the vendor have agreed on the sale price of a flat, you sign a "preliminary sale and purchase agreement" and pay a 3% deposit. In the course of the next 10 days or so, you will need to pay another 7% deposit and sign a formal sale and purchase agreement. Completion takes place about 30-45 days after the signing of the formal S&P agreement, during such time you have to come up with enough money to pay the remaining 90% balance (borrow from your parents/friends/boss, rob a bank, win the lottery, whatever suits you).

Anyway we completed our purchase today, and from tomorrow onwards the decorators will come into the flat and start stripping the place. It's an 18-year-old building so the plumbing and wiring is quite old already, plus the previous owners' taste for interior design is not really our cup of tea, so the whole place needs to be gutted and renovated.

The next three months will be painful (oh the mess! oh the weekly inspection and meeting with decorators! oh another invoice!) yet sweet (oh a new place! oh a custom-designed kitchen! oh a bigger study!).

I am so excited.

得啖笑誓師大會

老闆剛進我的office，給我看一份memo，說“等你看看，笑下都好”。

Memo内容如下：

“xxx集團企業文化變革創新誓師大會

時間：2006年x月xx日（星期六）上午10:00 - 12:30
地點：深圳市市民中心禮堂

-----方陣人員組成及演唱會歌詞一覽表

第一輪演唱歌曲:
《歌唱祖國》/ 《沒有共產黨就沒有新中國》/ 《團結就是力量》/ 《學習雷鋒好榜樣》

第二輪演唱歌曲:
《掀起你的蓋頭來》

第三輪演唱歌曲:
《小草》/ 《大中國》/ 《龍的傳人》/ 《長江之歌》”

........memo裏還有其他的内容，包括這一句“各單位按分配名額參訓，不得缺席”。

老闆“幸運地獲邀請”帶同她的手下（即包括我）參加這誓師大會，但由於她當天有“緊要事”（她租了一條船跟朋友出海），故唯有“萬分抱歉，未能出席”。

嘩，我真是抹一把冷汗！如果要我去這些活動，唱這些歌，我怕我下半世都會發惡夢！（還要我星期六朝早去深圳？有無病！）

在中資公司打工，有些東西始終要慢慢習慣...

Shopping!

On Saturday we had dinner at MOG's place. After a satisfying 3-course meal and a few glasses of red and white, MOG said, "You wanna see my conquests in Europe?", meaning the suits/shoes/belts/shirts/bags/trousers/jackets/etc. he bought during his shopping spree in Milan/Florence/London in July.

In less than 10 minutes, the living room was covered with Prada bag/Christian Dior shirts/Dolce & Gabbana belts/Gucci suits/Tod's shoes/numerous other pretty things. "They were all at least 1/3 of the original price! Everywhere in Europe is on sale!", said MOG. We ooh-ed and aah-ed at these amazing bargains for the rest of the night.

I don't know about the others, but I was drooling with envy. It has been a long while since I last went on a shopping spree. Those who know me well would know this is almost a miracle. When I was younger, I once shopped so much in Paris that I returned with only GBP10 to spend until the next pay check arrived in a week's time (I was too thin-skinned to ask Dad to wire me money). My friends, witnessing my misery, jumped in to buy me lunches and dinners during that week. That was the first time I experienced the power of friendship. *sniff*

Seeing those pretty things at MOG's, the shopaholic inside me was screaming and bursting to come out. BB, who loves me too much to see my suffer, has promised to take me to Europe next summer:


DBJ: I want to go shopping in Florence! I want to buy that Prada travel bag!! Why don't we go to Europe next year? Or better still, we can go shopping in Italy, stop over in Lisbon to visit your grandpa, and then stop over in London to visit your parents! Isn't that perfect?

BB: Yeah.

DBJ: And we can go in the summer! The weather will be fantastic and we can shop all day!! And I can finally meet your grandpa and we can see your parents!! Isn't it great?

BB: Yeah.

DBJ: So is that a promise? Promise? Promise? PROMISE??????

BB: Yeah. Whatever.


As you can see, we are SO going to Europe next summer yippee!!!!

Regret is

after you have eaten a bag of crisps, feel a little bad about your lack of self-control, decide to hit the gym, and after 45 minutes on the stepper machine, realise you have only burnt 427 calories. You go back home and check the nutritional information of the crisps, and find that you have just invited 568 calories into you body.

Then you think "shit, I shouldn't have eaten any bloody crisps in the first place. What was I thinking?"

That, my friends, is regret.

This post should have been up long ago but for the stupid Blogger site glitches...

...OR "On the 11688th Day of My Life".

Birthday card from BB (yes that is a beaded ring):


Free box of Krispy Kreme donuts (distributed in Central to advertise the opening of their first shop in Hong Kong; ex-colleague got two boxes and gave one to me):


Where my precious 8 hours on this special day was spent:


present from my brother:


My birthday dinner at home:
a) they taste much better than they look, trust me
b) these photos were taken when the dishes were half finished - I kept reminding myself I should take pictures first before eating, but when the dishes landed on the dining table I forgot all about the photos

Stir fried king prawns with broccoli


Chicken in sweet soy sauce (Mom's signature dish)


Vegetables and dumplings and fishballs in seafood soup


Thank you all of you for the sweetest warmest birthday wishes (via telephone, email and SMS). You have made this day truly special.

給排球隊小隊長

你說爲什麽人長大了要考慮那麽多的事情，做那麽多的決定，年輕時不用那麽煩惱啊。

小隊長，這是你千千萬萬人生交叉點的開始啊。你現在要考慮，要決定的事情，跟你往後要面對的事情比較（選擇那一份工？應不應該跟他拍拖？興趣緊要還是生計緊要？跟他明明沒將來，應否為怕分手之後的彷徨而勉強自己跟他在一起？應否結婚？應否生小孩？應否原諒他？），其實不算太惱人。但這總是你人生中第一個比較重要的決定，所以你的猶豫，我能夠了解的。

但你要記緊啊，可以選擇，是福氣。能夠選擇，代表你已經長大；能夠長大，也是福氣。在選擇的過程中你會更了解自己，你會發現原來你擁有一些你從來不知道的性格，也擁有一些你不曉得的陰暗面。這個自我發掘的遊戲其實挺過癮的。

當你踏入要為自己的前途作決定的年紀時，也代表你有能力為自己的生命和選擇作承擔。“承擔”，說時重，做時輕。需要的只是那一點點對自己的尊重，那一點點的勇氣，那一點點的忍耐。尊重自己的選擇，勇於面對失敗，耐心等待成功的來臨。時下的年輕人常欠缺承擔，但你作爲排球隊隊長，應該十分明瞭並正身體力行承擔的精神吧。

記着啊，能為自己生命作決定，能選擇自己想走的道路，終究是好事。假如決定錯誤，選擇的道路有偏差，那也沒什麽大不了啊。 你的最大優點是年輕，沒有什麽錯誤或道路是不能糾正或回頭的。

最重要的是，你身邊有一個年紀比你大，做過的決定比你多，走過的歪路也比你多的姐姐嘛。你有什麽問題或想不通的事情，記得找她，她的意見未必中肯，但起碼你會知道，這條路，並不是你一個人在走。

P.S. 謝謝你的生日歌，雖然唱得很難聼，但心意搭夠啦。

邊爐美學

這是我看過對打邊爐最有詩意的揣釋：

“鍋爐的熱氣是最好的面具，讓人仍然看見你，但看不見真的你。其實除了熱氣，打邊爐的過程亦足成就另一種障眼法。各式肉菜擺滿了桌子，你站起身仔細端察，假裝把注意力放置於挑選食物之上，然後用筷子夾起其中一件，放進小箕，把箕子輕輕伸到爐湯之中；你的眼睛全神貫注地望着鍋裏層層冒起的熱泡，不會有人覺得你心不在焉。

打邊爐的美學在於“留白”，你不必急於用聲音填滿飯桌，在手忙腳亂裡，沒有人會逼你表露自己。”

-- 馬家煇 “愛戀無聲”

（好書一本，趕快看啊！）

You know you are getting old...

...when you (almost) forgot your own birthday.

I was aware that August is coming, but it didn't occur to me that my birthday is around the corner too until my first birthday present this year arrived in the mail from my future mom-in-law (aka BBM). That's so sweet of her.

It seems that after hitting the big three Oh, birthdays are irrevalent. There is no excitement and expectation revolving around that day anymore, and your birthday wish has changed from "get a boyfriend", "get a better boyfriend!", "lose 10 pounds", "lose that extra 5.5 pounds!" to "good health" and "happiness". And you thought only 50-year-olds would wish for good health and happiness.

BB will be working late on my birthday so I plan to spend my evening curling up on my sofa (probably with my cat beside me), watch Frasier and eat a tub of Movenpick ice-cream. That would be quite cool.

Even crisps and Movenpick ice-creams cannot cheer me up...

I hate Sunday nights. They remind me of how the weekends fly by so quickly, and how I do not want to wake up early the next day and get to work.

It's been a productive weekend though. On Saturday we met up with my parents for dim sum, BB had his refresher driving lesson , and then we had dinner with Apple Juice (eating with good friends is one of the greatest pleasures). Today BB and I sorted out the kitchen design of our new house and paid a deposit (which marked the beginning of the "spending money like water" period).

Today at church, the topic of the sermon is "making the most of the time". Perhaps I should stop whinging and just be glad that I spent the weekend productively, and pray that I will learn to make the most of my time both at work and in life. After all, when you only have 14 weekends to sort out a wedding and a house renovation, nothing but good time management will save you.

A spotless mind

In what I consider the most romantic movie of all times, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Joel and Clementine undergo a procedure to erase each other from their memories. As the movie unfolds, Joel realises he does not really want to erase his memories about Clementine and that he still loves her, and so he tries to smuggle her back into his memory.

If you had a choice, would you erase anything from your memory? A failed relationship, a terrible mistake you made, or times of heartbreak and sorrow?

Some people say that in order to be happy, you have to forget the (not-so-happy) past and move on. I do not agree. I cherish the happy memories, and I embrace all the hearbreaking moments, the pain I felt and all the mistakes I made and foolish (borderline crazy) things I did in the past, for without them I would not become what I am today. For better or for worse, these memories are part of me.

I only live one life, a life given to me by God. I would not want to erase anything from it. Well, maybe a few inches from my waist. THAT I do want to erase.

Newsflash

On my way to work this morning, I had figured out what I would write today; I even had a mental draft in my head with all the paragraphs sorted and a funny title.

When I came into the office, my boss told me that she had handed in her resignation letter. She is the only other westernised person in the entire Hong Kong office. We share similar wavelength and professionalism, and although she is not a perfect boss (she has temper issues), I have so far enjoyed working with her.

So imagine my shock when she said she's quitting. Worse still, she said after she's gone, I will probably inherit all her files. That means I will have to deal with all the top-level politics which she is shielding me from at the moment. That means I will be handling two people's workload on a one-person income (no promotion or salary increase!). That also means that I will have to report to my boss' boss, a cocky Chinese guy who thinks he knows everything and never listens to lawyers.

I am dead meat.

謀殺案

真的很愛小動物，尤其是貓咪，所以每次看到虐待動物的新聞都會很心痛，真的是個心在“拿”住“拿”住的痛。

看到這個，心又難過起來。

近來很多關於虐待動物的報道，應是好事（因代表社會開始對動物權益關注，才會花篇幅報道），但每次看到有小動物被遺棄或虐待，也會很傷心，很憤怒。

如果我是神，我一定把這些衰人踢落地獄，讓他們永遠受苦，還有最好"an eye for an eye",那些扭斷小貓腳的，他的腳就要每天被扭斷，那些踢小貓的，便每天被踢，沒完每了，永不停止。

嘩，好彩我不是神，要不然世界就完蛋了。

Spoiled rotten

Today is so hot it gives me a massive headache. This is the pain of having a job which requires business day trips. Travelling to and from China on the same day in such hot weather is no fun at all.

Nothing beats going home (parents' home!) and having a "dinner of love" prepared by Dad (the master chef!). All food was prepared especially for me (steamed fish, steamed egg custard, steamed prawns, and stir fried broccoli and Chinese mushrooms)! It's been a long time since I last had dinner at home with my family. I missed the food so much. And spending time with people whom you are closest with is so enjoyable.

I am spoiled rotten hehe.

小宇宙萬歲

從來也不是一個可以multitask的人--做功課時不能聼音樂，講電話時不能覆電郵，諸如此類。叫得“大笨娜娜”，不是浪得虛名也。

所以，今天覺得自己很厲害，可以在一個早上接聼不同地產經紀的電話，安排看屋子的事情，又要跟印帖公司跟進喜帖的事宜，還可以同時看公司文件（很重要，畢竟公司有出糧給我嘛）。

人的小宇宙，總是在適當時（被迫時）便能發揮出來！

I love you, I love you not

At the sermon this evening, our pastor, when delivering a message on sexuality and the Bible (Proverbs 5:1-23), said "Chinese are culturally reserved with the expression of love".

And how true it that. For all my life, I have tried to say "I love you" to my parents, but somehow I just could not bring my lips to pronounce those three little words. Similarly, my parents have never told me they love me; their expression of love is through actions (e.g. phone calls from mom asking me to wrap up when it's cold, home cooking delivery by dad, etc.).

I have no problem telling BB how much I love him, but when it comes to my mom and dad, it's quite another thing.

Mini Me

Last Saturday my boy (Bak Bak, or BB) and I went to this place for a casual photo shoot session. It was a truly enjoyable experience. During that one hour session, we ran around in the studio, laughed a lot, jumped so much that we were utterly exhausted afterwards, while our talented and friendly photographer took snap shots of us. It was a very fun hour.

Today we went back to the studio to look at the edited photos. I was so shocked - I've never looked so beautiful in my life. Beautiful because the photos really captured the moments - the moments when we were naturally laughing, talking, not when we were consciously posing for pictures.

We are very pleased with the photos, and have chosen some of our better shots which will be processed and framed. I can't wait for them to arrive.

Give us today our daily bread

Read the newspaper this morning about something really disturbing. The headline of the newspaper reads "Restaurant in North Korea sells children's flesh". Some N Koreans who have fled to the US exposed to the world the terrible famine condition in their home country - people are so hungry that they eat their own children ("delicious", said the children-eating parents), restaurant owners, desperate to sell meat dishes, lure street children and then strangled them and make food out of their flesh, passing if off as pork. And it is happening NOW, not during WW2.

It is hard for people like us to imagine what life is like in a famine-stricken country. Living in Hong Kong, we are spoiled for choice. (At the time of writing this I just came back from a lunch buffet). We are so blessed that we often take things for granted.

For some reason this piece of news really strikes me. Perhaps because it is N Korea, a country only a few hours away from Hong Kong, or perhaps because it is children eating, something so gross it's beyond human imagination.

Reading this, it surely puts everything in perspective.

我愛電話

就算天氣再熱，心情再懷，只要與遠方的朋友通一個電話，聼聼他們的聲音，就這麽一兩句，就足以令人快樂起來，能量之大，直逼丸仔。

人大了，越發覺真正朋友買少見少，遇到了，便要努力維繫。好朋友，從來都是苦心經營的。

懶

這陣子很懶，做什麽事也提不起勁。工作時如遊魂，巴不得馬上下班，但下班後其實也沒什麽事做。

自己知道是什麽一回事。是暴風雨的前夕，那種將發生但沒發生的忐忑不安，那種已知但未知的惆悵，就像一塊石頭懸掛在心上，令人透不過氣。

過了11月，應該天朗氣清了吧。

Things that make me smile

My cat (3 months old):



My cat (now):



My Boy's childhood photo:

Will you?

Will you come and follow me if I but call your name?
Will you go where you don't know and never be the same?
Will you let my love be shown? Will you let my name be known,
will you let my life be grown in you and you in me?

Will you leave yourself behind if I but call your name?
Will you care for cruel and kind and never be the same?
Will you risk the hostile stare should your life attract or scare?
Will you let me answer prayer in you and you in me?

Will you let the blinded see if I but call your name?
Will you set the prisoners free and never be the same?
Will you kiss the leper clean and do such as this unseen,
and admit to what I mean in you and you in me?

Will you love the "you" you hide if I but call your name?
Will you quell the fear inside and never be the same?
Will you use the faith you've found to reshape the world around,
through my sight and touch and sound in you and you in me?

Lord your summons echoes true when you but call my name.
Let me turn and follow you and never be the same.
In Your company I'll go where Your love and footsteps show.
Thus I'll move and live and grow in you and you in me.

"Will You Come and Follow Me"
by John Bell (1949- ) and Graham Maule (1958- )

厚禮

自問不算好人，犯罪頻頻，怎能收此厚禮？

很怕很怕有一天都會統統從我手中拿走。

如果我還沒準備好，可以給我寬限期嗎？

Amazing Grace

Am reading "What Is So Amazing About Grace?" by Philip Yancey (a very renowned Christian journalist and author).

The book is about the grace of God, about forgiveness and why and how we should forgive people. It is a great book in itself, for Philip Yancey is a very gifted writer, and can turn the most abstract and difficult topic into a pleasant walk in the park. But reading this book gives me great discomfort, like I am being hit on the head with a big hammer whenever I read the words "grace", "forgive", "sin", etc.

The book says we should forgive, no matter how difficult it is, because God forgives us. Unconditionally. No strings attached.

Can I do that? Can I forgive that woman, who was supposed to be my good friend, whom I cared about very much, for trying to steal my ex-boyfriend?

I have moved on since then, and now I have a great life, a loving fiance, a circle of close friends. I should be glad that she did what she did, for without her and her actions I would not have come to this stage of my life. But how can I FORGIVE her? Forgive someone who blatantly betrayed me, betrayed my trust and friendship?

I have bumped into her a few times after our big fall-out and every time I saw her, my heart pounded like it's going to explode and my eyes were screaming "where should we look? We don't know where to look!". I always thought I would ONLY act like this when I see Johnny Depp.

That was a couple of years ago. I wonder, if I see her again now, how would I react? Would I act like the same idiot I was two years ago? Most probably.

I do not like hatred and I don't usually harbour one. But when I do, it lingers on for a very long time. Wonder what God would say about that. He will not be proud.

I know I really have to move on. Three years is too long a time.