過了整整一個多月的狂歡作樂，今天早上終於要與久違了的電子磅say hello。
兩腳踏上去後，後悔也來不及，小小的液晶体顯示器已經顯示了一個足叫我差點暈倒的數字。這也怪不得，我早就知道那些雪糕啊，薯片啊，芝士餅啊，各種各類的甜品啊，等等等等是世紀大魔鬼，奈何自己意志力長久薄弱，面對這些香甜軟滑或脆卜卜的魔鬼時，想也不想，半點掙扎也沒有，就如螞蟻粘蜜糖般衝倒過去。 我愛零食，就好像女人愛壞男人一様，明知下場坎坷，也要燈蛾撲火。
唉，減肥戰爭又再正式開始...
噢，或者等我星期六打完邊爐才開始吧。
After a week of indulgence with wine, cheesecakes, tiramisu, Christmas puddings, left over turkey, crabcakes and vegetables, etc., life is back on its normal track now.
We had a great party at our place on Xmas night, and apparently everybody had a good time. We did Secret Santa (it's a kind of gift exchange in which you were told beforehand whom you are going to buy the present for but the recipient does not know it's coming from you - hence the Secret Santa - and he has to guess who the present's from), and it was the highlight of the night, apart from the yummy food and cocktail prepared by our friends.
As for New Year's Eve, I am not going to tell you what we did, except that it involves a very nice dinner, champagne, wine, good friends, dancing, throwing up, laughing and an expensive bill. We have photo-documented the whole night but I am waiting for someone to bribe me not to post them :)
The Christmas and New Year's bash aside, I am very thankful for all the blessings I was showered with in 2006. Christmas is about hope and faith and love. We celebrate Christmas because it is the birthday of our Savior, a baby sent to us by God to save us, and therefore we are cleansed of our sins and can start our lives anew, if only we have faith in Him. This is the true meaning of Christmas.
And what is a birthday party without food and booze and good friends?
I had a meeting with my boss, the Acting General Counsel, today in Shenzhen. He was hired a couple of months ago as an IP counsel for the company, but because of the departure of our GC, he was then appointed Acting GC until a replacement is found.
He is a nice guy. I knew it the very first moment I met him. He's Malaysian Chinese who has spent the better part of his life in the US. He's worked in a leading US law firm and in a major US company so his experience and exposure is more than excellent.
Most of all he is a good guy. I didn't have a chance to get to know him very well back when he started his job (he is based in Shenzhen, me Hong Kong; plus I started my marriage leave shortly after he joined) But today we had a long chat, and he reaffirmed my impression of him. For a GC, one may think he is too idealistic and optimistic, but hearing him say what he said, you can't help thinking that "hmm...this is good. We need leaders like him with passion and vision". He does not give you lectures and lessons, instead he shares with you his experience, with the help of some funny real and fake stories, to get the message across to you.
I was most impressed when he told me that "family always comes first. If you do what you think is right for your family and your company doesn't appreciate that, then maybe this company is not worth your effort. You can always change your job, but you can never change your family". To take up his position in Shenzhen, he had to relocate his whole family (wife + 3 kids) from the US. He certainly has a very supportive family.
When he first joined, my ex-boss (GC who has now left) and some other senior management had doubts whether he may survive this company, since he seems to be too idealistic and westernised to be working in a political and chaotic PRC company. But there is something about him that makes me believe that not only will he make a good boss, he may actually be able to win the favour and trust of our management, and therefore make all our little lawyer lives a whole lot better.
I have friends who, for all his/her life, works for bosses from hell. I have been really fortunate in this aspect, as most of my bosses are good leaders and nice people. Let's hope that it stays that way.
Labels:
Work
This morning I went for an interview with another company. This is a world renowned sports company whose products have won the favour of millions of people, including my newly acquired husband BB.
The interview was very brief, with me meeting only the HR manager for about 15 minutes. The HR manager asked me the standard questions, and then went on to explain their corporate culture and management style.
I was told that the company is highly performance driven, and there have been, and will be, a lot of changes in personnel and company direction. The way she said it (plus her facial expression) suggested that the company is merciless when it comes to year end evaluation - if the company thinks you are not delivering results (revenue), you can pretty much start packing.
After the two interviews I had yesterday and today, I find that it really is a big bad world out there. And what has surprised me is how honest the interviewers have become these days. I remember a few years back, whoever I interviewed with would only tell me all the glorious things about their company. You have to conduct your own due diligence through your friends, or friends of your friends, who work in that company.
Despite the many complaints I may have about my current employer (lack of leadership and vision, undesirable corporate culture, poor management skills, the rudeness of some of my PRC colleagues, etc etc), I do enjoy really flexible working hours (many times my friends call me at 6pm and I am already on my way home) and I have kind of established myself in the company. Do I want to throw all these away and
rush to the unknown, where I may have to work 15 hours a day, or help the company generate millions of profits, so as to justify my existence?
I am not too sure now.
But I am not too worried about it. I have prayed about it and have lifted it all up to God. I am never sure what will be best for me, but God is.
Labels:
Work
I went for an interview today. The company runs what most people consider a very glamours business and is one of the biggest employers in HK. During the interview, the following conversation took place:
General Counsel (my potential future boss, should they/I decide to hire me/join the company): I've got to tell you, this company has the worst politics. You must come here with no expectation because whatever expectation you have as a lawyer you will be very disappointed when you see no one appreciates you. The legal function in this company doesn't command any respect. You have to fight for everything every day. We don't even have our own standing and have to sit under the personnel division. [GC went on to tell me horrible stories about their legal team being treated like crap]
Me: [Still smiling] I see. Sounds like your company is as chaotic as mine.
GC: Yeah. Everyday is a battle. You have to deal with all sorts of people problems. It's trouble when they come to you for advice. It's even more trouble when they don't come to you until shit hits the fan.
GC then continued for another 15 minutes to talk about the pain of being a lawyer for this company, and then went on to talk about business trips:
GC: Business trips is part and parcel of this job. I don't expect you to travel a lot on a frequent basis but when you do, the business trips can be extremely demanding. I have more than once travelled long haul to a country, only to be there for a few hours and then I have to get on the earliest plane to come back to HK. And you are not allowed to have jet-lag. Oh and since your role is a world-wide role, you will have to work the Europe and US time zones as well, and when you have a global conference call, you sometimes have to get up at 5am to take those calls.
Me: [......]
GC: And senior management may wake you up in the middle of the night and ask you questions, and you have to give them answers there and then.
Me: [......]
While I truly appreciate the honesty of the GC in telling me the reality of the working environment despite the huge risk of scaring me away (he said, and I truly agree, that he'd rather tell me everything upfront for me to make an informed decision than for us to have a mismatch of expectation), I cannot help thinking how tough it will be working in such a position, having to deal with the sorts of challenges that were mentioned, and having to work 3 time zones and weekends and take late night and early morning calls. The remuneration package is not spectacular either. And did I mention that should I take the job, I will have to spend 3.5 hours each day commuting to and from work?
The upside of things is that their office complex is like a mini community, equipped with a gym, a theatre, a mini supermarket, a bank, and whatever you can think of in a local community. Oh and you get to see many many glamours people every day. That's not too bad.
Labels:
Work
如果眼睛是靈魂之窗，而你因爲戴了那些新科技小黑環隱形眼鏡而使瞳孔變得大了亮了，而如果有男生因爲你大了亮了的瞳孔而愛上了你，那你怎辦？難道日日夜夜也要跟這小膠片做朋友？你又有沒有欺騙觀衆之嫌？
眼睛會説話。我可以理解人們（包括我）希望用eye shadow, mascara, eye liner, 等等等等把眼睛弄得漂亮一點，但瞳孔是另一回事，它是一個人真誠的指標。如果隨隨便便的把這個指標加大改小，那和騙子又有什麽分別？ 我看見你但看不見真的你，那我還是不是看見你呢？
《小事情》-- 陳慧
“別小看生活中這些小事情，小事情中有大道理。因爲每個人的生命，都是日日夜夜由如此這般的小事情交織而成。”
很久沒有看過一本叫我真正感動的書。如書名一樣，說的都是發生在小人物身上的小事情。陳慧一向擅長觀察和捕足生活的細節和感情描寫，這次沒有例外。
你和我都是小人物，看這書，你會驚訝有人可以這麽精准地了解你的内心世界。在地鐵裏看這書，好幾次弄得我鼻子酸酸。旁人怪怪的看着我，好不尷尬。
趕快看哪！
在風和日麗的下午，吃着自己摘的，紅紅的水果，看着不太嚴肅的書。
屋子被葡萄樹包圍，綠綠的，眼睛很久沒有這麽舒服過了。在草地上奔跑着，跟大黑狗玩角力，跟愛人踢足球，這種喜悅，不能言喻。
小羊Bob。看着他，想起家裏的貓。然後發現，自己惦念的人或物，只要回到家就可以看見，著實是一種福氣。
跟愛人在路上奔馳，他駕車我看地圖，聼着At 17，Madonna，Santana，Robbie Williams，又越過高山又越過谷。
在湖邊餵鴨子。牠們一看到麵包，就從老遠游到岸邊，團團的包圍着你。鴨仔歌伴着浪聲，比世上任何音樂還要好聼。
雨後的彩虹，久久不散。
看到無盡的山脈，看到蔚藍的天，看到上帝的大能。
一覺睡醒，迎接自己的，是美味的早餐。
與愛人看日落。
早上七點半，在農場的母牛，被帶進牛棚裏榨牛奶。不久，隱隱聽到牛棚外有叫聲，走出去看，發現小牛原來從老遠的農場走到棚外等媽媽，待母牛榨完牛奶之後，兩母子就一起緩緩地走回農場。每天如是。“牠們就好像人一樣啊！”農場主人說。
在一個別人要上班的下午，在餐廳隱蔽的後院裏，吃着青口喝着啤酒，感覺着皮膚被慢慢曬黑。（現在的我黑得像菲傭一樣）
你說，活着，多好。
BB and I are now at Kiwiland airport waiting to fly back home. This past two weeks has been a blast. We have done the adventurous things (riding on a 4x4 across a river!) and we have had time to just chill out and relax (and snap loads of pictures).
As much as I enjoy being pampered by good food and sunshine and blue sky every day, I am missing home now. More importatnly I can already think of 1,000 post-wedding/honeymoon chores I need to do when I am back.
So stay put. I promise I will come back with an update (and pictures) soon!
- the weather was superb on your wedding day (sunshine and blue sky!)
- your best men, bridesmaids and groomsmen, being ever so professional, help you take care of all of your worries so you can concentrate on being the bridezilla you want to be/can't help being
- your maids of honour, having known you for so many years and having seen the worst of you, are willing to subject themselves to a day of hard work and dealing with the drama queen, in the hope that they will also get to see the best of you (Amy & Susanna, I love you)
- your close friends and family are the witnesses of this important moment of your life
- you get to marry the love of you life, and spend the rest of your life with him, for better or for worse
- your marriage is blessed by God and He sure was as happy as you are on your big day
A big thank you to all of you who were there at the church wedding ceremony and/or the evening reception. Words cannot begin to express how much it means to both BB and me that you could be there to share our joy. A heartfelt thank you in particular to those who travelled all the way from all corners of the earth to attend our wedding. We love you all.
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BB and I are now in KiwiLand. The food here is superb and the scenery even better. People say sometimes a place is so beautiful you just have to point the camera and shoot, no matter where you're standing. KiwiLand is just like that. More later. Now I need to make myself a chamomile tea to help digest all the oysters and seafood I had. Don't be surprised when you see me become a balloon in two weeks.
I am starting to have the following nightmares about my wedding day:
(a) my make-up artist failed to turn up on the wedding morning and I had to do my own hair and make-up (disaster);
(b) I snoozed the alarm too many times so that when I woke up it was already 11.30, as opposed to 8.15 when I was supposed to get up (disaster);
(c) while I walking down the aisle, I tripped over my oh-so-pretty wedding dress and had the worst belly flop in front of all the guests and made a complete jerk of myself (major disaster).
Panic attack again. I need fresh air.
How do you work with someone for whom you have zero respect?
How do you work with someone who asks you to replace the word "free" in the sentence "...Party A warrants that the products will be free from defect..." with something else because "people may think it means "free of charge""?
How do you work with someone who always interrupts a conversation so at any given time during a conference call you can hear at least 2 voices speaking simultaneously, and the noise is giving you a splitting headache?
How do you work with someone who is so stupid that you think it's a sin for him to exist in this world, and you actually feel embarrassed to be seen working with him?
I need a drink.
(I)
昨天黃昏，放工途中，在地鐵裏如常地開始發白日夢，想着想着，忽然驚覺原來距離結婚日子，只有三星期不夠，心裏發毛，冷汗直標。
之前一直忙於新屋裝修的事情，籌備婚禮的工作擱在一邊，現在家也搬了，也就繼續婚禮準備。只是沒有想到，原來時光真的會飛逝，剩下的日子不多了，但好像很多事情還沒準備好。喜帖沒派完，鞋子沒造好，教堂程序表沒印好，皮膚還是很差（豆豆跟我仍是好朋友）...怎麽辦？
(II)
Last night on the way back home after our meeting with the videographers, BB said, shaking his head, "You really are a control freak". I tend to believe him, because I was getting that feeling too. From the house moving to the wedding preparations, I just have to be involved in every minute detail of things. From the colour of the paint to the way the door handles should be installed; from the style of my wedding dress to the exact timing the photographer should appear at our doorstep to the way I want my bouquet to be tied (hand-tied, not the round ones), I just need to be sure everything is under control, and that everything is to my liking.
I remember some years ago when I was lunching with my gal friends and we were talking about weddings and other gal stuff, all my gal friends agreed that I was gonna be one bridezilla. I didn't know what prompted them to say that, for I didn't think I was particularly fuzzy or demanding (on the contrary I thought I was rather easy-going). They said "yes you are easy-going, but when it comes to wedding, you will be a Bridezilla with a capital B". Damn, I hate it when they are right.
...and the bathrooms and the study and the bedroom and the guest room and the living room and the dining room, which are all new and shiny and smell of paint and new wood.
The housemoving could not have gone more smoothly, starting from Friday evening when we moved some of the smaller boxes to the new house (with the help of our friends), and ending with the big moving truck coming over and wrapping our sofa and dining table and mattress with super large cling film and transporting everything big and small to the new house on Sunday afternoon. The unpacking and tidying up took only a few hours (with the help with both my parents and BB's mom and the part time maid) and by 8pm Sunday the new house is 99% functional. We are so blessed in having such lovely parents and friends.
I am so glad this is now over. We can finally focus on the wedding preparations in the next few weeks.
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P.S. I never realised I have expensive taste until Saturday afternoon, when we met with the florist / event co-ordinator to discuss our wedding decoration. When asked what kind of flowers we wanted to use for the wedding, I picked the flowers which turned out to be really expensive (e.g some rare specie of peony, amaryllis, and some exotic flowers the names of which I can't remember, etc). This wasn't intentional - I just thought they were super beautiful. Obviously, BB wasn't impressed (and kept rolling eyes at me), and at the end a compromise was reached, so that instead of using all the expensive flowers, we will also mix them with some of my less favourite, but more economical, flowers.
So don't be surprised when you will see roses at our wedding reception.
If my job requires me to:
(1) travel to China (by cross-border shuttle bus) on a weekly basis; and
(2) work with people who think they are always rights just because they happen to be your boss,
and I:
(a) have a massive headache every time I commute to and from China; and
(b) do not enjoy one bit working with those smart asses, who are rude and unreasonable to say the least,
should I then seriously consider quitting? But won't that mean I admit defeat? I am better than that. If I go somewhere else, does that mean I can avoid working with Chinese at all?
My head is spinning again.
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On a different note, WE ARE MOVING HOUSE TOMORROW! Our old house is now full of boxes, and apparently Siu Bo is very confused now, seeing all the boxes stacked up in our living room but having no idea what is going on. I hope he is not thinking that we are conspiring to abandon him.
My next posting will probably be made from our new apartment!!!
原來我很介意別人怎樣看我。
原來我很容易哭。尤其是受委屈的時候。
原來我很需要被我重視的人了解。如果我的說話被誤解，我會不厭其煩地解釋，直到對方明白（或怕我煩所以敷衍說明白）。
如果我一直當你是朋友，但你只把我當作你講是非的一個題目，我會很傷心。但我已經學會放手，畢竟我的朋友多的是，少你一個不算少。
原來我愛我的家人，比我想象更多。但我從來沒有表現出來。
原來在工作的層面上，我從來不是一個有野心，喜歡挑戰的人。一份朝九晚五，不需用腦的工作，其實最適合我。
原來我是很膚淺的（見到靚仔會開心半天！）。
原來我的意志力很薄弱。看我減肥減了這麽多年還是老樣子便知道了。
原來我是一個記仇的人。我可以原諒一個人，但他對我的不好，我一世都會記得。
原來我很怕看那些關於落後民族的紀錄片。一看到他們的大耳窿，畫花了的臉，吃樹皮（或其他奇怪的食物），我會毛骨悚然。我承認在這事上，我是徹底的種族歧視。
原來我不喜歡我的芝士被移動。“改變”跟我，從來也不是好朋友。
原來我非常極度十分不喜歡社交。 在社交場合，我可以表現得很好，但我一點也不享受。
最好的工餘節目是回家跟貓玩。看看電視也不錯。跟愛人家人朋友在家吃飯也很好。
原來我在這裡寫的東西，真的有人看。謝謝你們給我的回應與鼓勵。我開這個blog，就是爲了跟你們分享，這目的，現在總算達到了。
My posting has been a bit sporadic lately, and it's likely to be the case at least for the next two weeks.
The renovation of our new flat is coming to an end and we are hoping to move in the next weekend. That means in the next ten days or so, we will spend all our evenings and weekend packing and bubble wrapping things. This is a stressful exercise. Fun, but stressful.
I'd better lose 10 pounds out of this.
OR "Oh-my-God-the-baby's-heart-is-beating!" or "Oh-my-God-it-has-the-cutest-lips!"
My friend B is 25 weeks into her pregnancy and this morning she and her husband C paid a visit to the doctor for her regular pregnancy check-up. I, the nosy one who enjoy being vicariously pregnant, tagged along. After some routine blood and urine sample collection, we were shown to the ultrasound room.
B and C must be very used to this, but I was very nervous, as this is the first time I get to see a real baby through ultrasound.
The baby had its face hidden by its hands most of the time, and we couldn't see clearly its features. In fact most of the time all I could see was a big circle (the head). But at the very end, for a few seconds, the baby removed its hands from its face and we could see its features. It has very cute thin lips and a big nose (CUTE!). I also heard its heart beating. It was awesome and I was almost speechless (except the arrrhhs and ohhhhhs).
The mystery of childbirth never ceases to amaze me. This is probably God's biggest and best manifestation of his omnipower.
Since my university years, I have never enjoyed being the centre of attention.
When I was young, I used to get a lot of attention. I went to a very decent girls' school, I was always one of the good students who got good grades and never caused troubles. I was rather popular (at least when compared to the geeky ones) in school and had quite a lot of good friends (most of whom I manage to keep in touch till now, for which I am very proud of myself). I was a member of the English debate team and once I won the best speaker prize. I took part in the drama competition and enjoyed every bit of it.
Until I got into the university. The uni experience was really an eye-opener. In law school, you see all kinds of smart people, REALLY SMART people. Your classmates are from international schools so even though they are also locally born and bred like you, they speak impeccable English. Some are from really really rich families. And did I say they are smart?
The transition from secondary school to university years is a very humbling experience. You discovered that you were nowhere near being the cream of the people. I wasn't frustrated for I am not the competitive type, but since then I had this change within me, the change that tells me I should avoid being in the lime light at all costs, because I am never good enough when compared to some other people. This is not a sense of inferiority, this is just reality.
I write about this because more and more I feel that I am starting to get the attention now. I get asked questions about the wedding preparations, whether I feel nervous, and how they all look forward to seeing "the most beautiful bride", etc. etc. While I do really appreciate the care and concerns and compliments (and yes I also want to be the most beautiful bride, but first I need the stupid zits to leave me alone), sometimes I feel quite uncomfortable addressing these questions and comments, because the conversation would be all about me me me. Most importantly, I worry that the people who ask the questions may only ask them out of courtesy, and are therefore not really interested in what I've got to say, so I tend to keep the conversation brief. As BB said, telling a person who's not getting married anytime soon everything about YOUR wedding preparations may bore the hell out of him/her.
So next time when you ask me how the wedding preparations are going and I respond with a simple "it's ok lah", it's not because it's ok (wedding preparations are never ok, you have all sorts of complications), it's only because I don't want to bore you with the minute details.
But if you really are interested in what flowers I use for the wedding, what are the colors of my evening dresses, what hairstyles I would wear, etc. etc., you can always come to this blog. After all, a bridezilla would not be able to hold her excitement. Thank God for cyberspace.
